TOXIC POSITIVITY FROM MLM - (and online influencers)

23 Aug 2021

TLDR: These guys follow the same formula.

How do MLM recruiters (and marketers) hijack your psychology and trick you into doing stupid things?

Always be positive and stop listening to your negative thoughts.

Do not listen to the voice that tells you that you can’t.

Do not listen to the voice that tells you that you’re not good enough.

Do not listen to the voice that shows you the negative events of your past.

Do not pay attention to your weakness.

Your past doesn’t define your future.

Fake it until you make it.

Don’t follow your fear. Follow your dreams.

You need to trick your heart into being brave.

These are all positive, empowering sayings.

Here’s what you’re missing out on.

Your brain’s job is to keep you alive and prevent you from killing yourself by doing something stupid.

Your brain tells you that you can’t when it knows that you can’t.

Sure, there are breakthrough points.

We do eventually achieve success outside of our comfort zone.

However, this is often a result of new knowledge, learning a skill, support of other people, and a change in attitude.

In most cases, our success is a result of all the examples mentioned in the previous sentence.

I told a family friend who runs a successful business that I aim to be a millionaire by 30 when I joined an MLM company.

He asked me a few offensive questions that I ignored for many years:

Do you have the resources to make it happen?

Do you have the education or training to execute your plan?

Do you have the required skills to follow through on your plan?

How are you going to make this happen then?

May pagkakaiba yung taong may pangarap sa buhay sa taong nananaginip lang.

I didn’t have an answer.

I was offended.

The conversation didn’t end well.

I was attending all the training, and I noticed a pattern.

Ninety percent of our multi-millionaire instructors just share positive quotes from motivational books.

The leader of our organization even has a bookstore of rare motivational books.

We occasionally learned something useful about sales, rejection, and showing up, but that’s it.

It’s like taking boxing lessons where you only receive encouragement.

Just take the punches, toughen up, and keep showing up in the ring after learning one punch.

Any beginner who takes regular boxing lessons can beat me if I follow the above program.

The process is positive but incomplete.

I mastered the motivational, mental toughness stuff but spent very little time on the technical aspects of a business.

I wasn’t very intelligent.

I went back to this conversation long after collecting my missing business skills, eventually repairing my weakness, and confronted my flaws.

I’m writing this story because I’ve made it my practice to go through my past experiences and confront my flaws.

I hope to find lessons and develop new behaviors to avoid repeating my stupid past decisions.

It took many years and conversations with intelligent people before I figured out what the negative feedback meant.

Here are more refined questions to ask yourself:

What elements are you missing?

What do you need to learn?

What are you doing well?

What are you doing poorly?

Study what you need to learn.

You should befriend and listen to your negative voice.

Heed the warnings.

Acknowledge your weakness, and you can start projects to either fix the flaw or use strengths, learn skills, employ tools, or get help to overcome the weakness.

Not listening to the voice led me to fail.

Let’s talk about what’s wrong with the above statements.

ALWAYS BE POSITIVE and stop listening to your negative thoughts.

Your negative thoughts point out the problem.

What problems are your negative thoughts asking you to fix?

Your negative thoughts will cease bothering you once you fix the problems.

Do not listen to the voice that tells you that you can’t.

Why can’t you?

What resources are missing?

Can you succeed after acquiring these resources?

Yes? No? What else is missing?

Are you missing experience? What can you do to gain experience?

What can you do? Where can you go?

Who do you need to ask? Who can you ask?

Can you rent, borrow, build or learn how to acquire the missing resources?

The above questions demonstrate resourcefulness.

You can’t be resourceful if you’re ignoring the problem.

Do not listen to the voice that tells you that you’re not good enough.

Let’s say that you’re in the hospital for minor surgery.

You’re lying in a waiting room, and the nurse tells you to wait.

A few minutes later, you heard arguing just outside the waiting room.

You hear a voice that says:

“I’m going to become a surgeon NOW! I am good enough. I believe in myself! I do NOT need education!”

Would you proceed with the surgery, or would you get the hell out of there?

Hearing the exact same sentence should put fear in your heart.

You won’t hire a professional who’s faking it until they make it.

The law has a word for this exact behavior.

The word is for telling people that you are qualified for something that you’re not qualified to do is “fraud.”

Can you be a doctor, pilot, chef, or even a babysitter without training?

I’m not just talking about formal education.

You need legitimate knowledge and skills.

Just so you know, the higher the stakes (flying a plane, performing surgery, driving a car, taking care of a child), the more you need to be able to prove that you can do what you say you can do.

Entrepreneurship is a high-risk, high-reward pursuit.

Do you know how to sell?

Do you have a database of buyers?

Do you know how to manage people working for you?

Do you know how to recruit?

How well do you negotiate?

Do you have good money habits?

Do you have good knowledge of the market?

How well did you perform at your past work?

Do you have a good reputation at work?

How well do you manage your time?

How many books have you read about business?

What are your top two business skills?

What business skills are you horrible at?

What bad habit will likely cause you to fail in business?

What resources do you have at your disposal?

Who are the people who can bail you out should the worst-case scenario come?

How much money will you lose if you fail at this project?

What is your debt-repayment plan?

Do not listen to the voice that shows you the negative events of your past.

We remember painful events to learn lessons.

The brain reminds us because we haven’t learned the lesson.

That’s the main idea behind PTSD.

Something bad happens.

You didn’t know how to act at the moment.

Your brain repeatedly reminds you of the painful event because you still don’t have a solid plan moving forward in case the event happens again.

People who don’t learn from their history are doomed to repeat the tragedy.

Educate yourself on how to behave so that when the negative event repeats, that is no longer a problem.

You’re traumatized by a cooking accident. TAKE COOKING LESSONS!

You’re traumatized by a rejection. LEARN HOW TO COMMUNICATE!

You’re traumatized by bullying. LEARN HOW TO FIGHT!

You’re traumatized by insults. LEARN HOW TO THINK AND ARGUE!

You’re traumatized by ignorance and malevolence. ARM AND EDUCATE YOURSELF.

Do not pay attention to your weakness.

Weakness points precisely what you need to fix.

UPLINE: You’ll never be successful at your job—talks about how unfair the employment system is. Join our business. You’ll succeed here.

Do you join?

WRONG!!!

DON’T DO DUMB THINGS!

Ask INTELLIGENT QUESTIONS!

Why won’t I become successful?

What is wrong with me?

Is the boss not happy with my performance?

What is missing from my work ethic?

What is wrong with my attitude?

What result do I need to deliver that I fail to provide?

What task should I be doing that I’m NOT doing?

What activities do I regularly perform poorly?

Am I going to work late?

Am I doing my job well?

The upline says companies only exploit workers.

The only way up the corporate ladder is favoritism.

You’ll need to kiss ass to climb.

Does my boss treat the most competent and productive person in our company poorly?

Is the most productive person in our company compensated poorly?

If the answer is no, then THE PROBLEM IS ME!

The problem never was the company.

Who are your favorites?

Aren’t your favorites the people who are the best at something?

Why do we like superheroes?

Don’t we like them because they’re exceptional?

What do you have that’s exceptional?

What are you doing to be exceptional?

Can you take an online course to teach yourself to type faster?

Can you read an article on how to manage your time so you can be punctual?

Can you read ten books to learn how to communicate better?

Can you read magazines on how to dress well?

I’m laughing as I type this as I realized that these examples are the same activities you’ll need to do to participate in MLM or Network marketing anyway.

Your past doesn’t define your future.

People historically do the same thing over and over again until they get interrupted.

Are you succeeding or failing?

You will likely succeed more if you are already succeeding.

You will likely fail more if you are failing.

I spent five years pushing up.

I only made ₱5,000 to ₱10,000, but I never quit because I believed in the company, the mission, and my upline.

I wanted to be rich.

However, I also learned the value of my time.

My friend taught me how to plan my finances.

I learned that I could sell two packs of boiled eggs and make ₱66,000 a year.

That’s less money than what I earned in MLM.

However, it only takes thirty minutes a day to boil and sell eggs at the office.

I don’t need to travel to the MLM office or hold meetings in a coffee shop.

A regular office worker earns about ₱150 an hour.

Every hour I waste in traffic going to the MLM office consumes a minimum of ₱500 a day.

My biggest regret is that I could have worked overtime.

I could have sold eggs and sandwiches at the office and made more money.

I could have done anything else to have built a better life.

You can always make back the money, but you can never get back time.

Fake it until you make it.

You can trick people with no business experience into signing up for your business.

However, I nor my friends nor other people like me won’t buy from you.

There might be exceptions.

We’ll likely buy something to shut you up.

We’ll tell you that the product is good and other kind words.

But we won’t be loyal customers.

Underhanded tactics won’t trick people who are knowledgeable in business.

We can tell if a deal is good or bad.

Don’t confuse people who buy out of pity as signs that your product is good.

Sales that come from pitty are a sign that your business won’t last very long.

Unfortunately, these companies have armies of people who use the relationship to sell.

The distributors eventually fall off the roster when there are no more people to sell to.

New people who enter the job market don’t have experience, and they are suckered into joining companies like yours out of desperation.

You promised they’d make money upon signup.

They didn’t, and they’ll blame you and carry resentment for the rest of their lives.

You’ll be surprised when you’re eventually a big businessman and when you’re about to close a multi-million peso deal that the person you tricked is a close friend of this other bigshot that you’re about to negotiate with.

Your former downline will then say, “boss! That guy cheated me fifteen years ago. He promised I’d make money on this legit MLM deal, but he left me because the product isn’t selling and has avoided me for years.

Just like that, you lost your opportunity.

Worse things could happen.

The guy who got deep in debt to buy your products so he can sign up for your membership may build resentment and show up one day just stab you or your loved one.

How much is your membership again?

How much money do you make when someone signs up?

What’s sad about these statements is this was from an actual conversation with a family member.

I realized how true this was many years later.

Don’t follow your fear. Follow your dreams.

Fear helps you identify areas of your life that are vulnerable.

Don’t ignore your fear.

Use your fear to identify what you need to fix in your life.

I was afraid of cars and driving until I took driving lessons.

I learned the rules of the road and how to make my car move.

You can’t just build courage into driving a car.

You need to educate yourself.

If you’re afraid to start a business and a “franchise opportunity” looks attractive to you, ask yourself more intelligent questions.

What does a franchise provide that I can’t already do myself?

What projects do I need to complete to make my business run?

What tasks do I need to accomplish?

What skills do I need to learn?

What lessons do I need to acquire?

Where can I buy these lessons?

A steak at a fancy restaurant costs ₱4,000 or more.

You can purchase the same cut of steak at the supermarket for under ₱1,000 a kilo.

A business is a way for people to earn money selling things.

However, buying a business, a system of earning money by selling things will likely cost you more than it’s worth.

You need to trick your heart into being brave.

Do you have to trick your heart into eating?

Do you have to trick your heart into going to the bathroom?

Do you have to trick your heart into buying food when you are hungry?

Why not?

That’s because you know how to do these activities.

If you’d like to play the piano and you don’t know-how.

You get piano lessons.

You don’t trick your heart into suddenly knowing the piano.

You don’t trick your heart into cooking.

You don’t trick your heart into riding a bicycle.

You don’t trick your heart into fighting.

You learn the required skill and practice until you are competent.

You become confident after you are competent.

Like Robert Kiyosaki repeatedly said, “you need to educate yourself.”

If you feel that you have to trick your heart, there’s probably a high enough level of ignorance to trigger your fear.

I’ll stop here.

What positive sayings or motivational quotes has someone else used to manipulate you?

Published on 23 Aug 2021 Find me on Twitter!